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RE-PETE, 48, short, stocky, wears earplugs to protect his ears from live music. He is the resident hypochondriac. He loves to gossip and has delusions that young pretty women want to make love with him. He is part of “The Marihuana Choo-Choo”.


OCEAN, 65, is the fat den mother to the bar. She is always suggesting some kind of new herbal remedy that she is selling for any kind of issue, physiological or psychological that may, or may not exist. She has a persistent unrequited crush on India. She is into the Age of Aquarius and good vibrations although she has a problem with flatulence.


GERI, 35, is a quirky British singer with a crazy high-pitched laugh. She has a working class accent but her day job is as a mortgage officer with a credit union. She sings her heart out every Tuesday and loves to flirt with the men.


ELKE, 24, is the Viking princess buxom flaxen-haired barmaid. She has a mean right hook which strikes terror in unruly drunks. She is spontaneous and knows how to extract good tips from the older men.


Maverick, 60, handsome, redneck, highly competitive, is an ex-professional hockey player and sports nut who also looks great in heels. He loves the good life. He is one of the organizers for “Save Capt. Jake’s”. He loves conspiracy theories. He has had an on-off secret love affair with Sylvia.


INDIA, 72, is a cantankerous hippie with a braided ponytail. Like Maverick, he is a history buff and friend of Jake. He is the bar’s grass dealer who loves to make provocative and sometimes offensive comments about people in the bar. He used to be the bouncer.


GILLES, French-Canadian, 55-60 , 6 ft., stocky, balding, is the director of the community theatre “Et Cetera” in the Beaches Inn in the same building as Capt. Jake’s. He is also one of the organizers for the campaign: Save Capt. Jake’s.


SYLVIA, 45, is the Chairperson of the board which administers the building. She is a ball-buster no nonsense type of woman who has an unfulfilled marriage with a Bay street lawyer, who travels a lot. She has a frustrating affair with Maverick which could mean love for her but not for him. She has a quirky hat collection. Her goal is to destroy Capt. Jake’s and replace it with a wine bar.


ROCKY, 22, is the sexy Latina barmaid with a great singing voice and a Spanish accent. She, like Elke, is efficient at getting big tips from the older men. She is quite naïve for a woman in her profession. She is a vegetarian. She dreams of being cast in a big musical.


FRISKY FRITZ, 40, gay, German background and bald. He is somewhat effeminate. He is also a fashion aficionado.


BB BOB, 70, retired, is one of the full-time resident alcoholics in the bar.


BILLY JOE, 25, handsome, works at “He and She” lingerie shop. He is the subject of Fritz’s attentions.


JAKE, 75, is a former CFL football star whose income is dependent upon Capt. Jake’s. He enjoys watching the antics of the bar regulars on CCTV in his apartment. Unfortunately, he is beginning to lose his memory.


SINBAD, the parrot is owned by Capt. Jake. He loves to watch the shenanigans in the bar via CCTV and mimic the patrons’ outrageous comments.